Self-talk, Confidence and Sobriety
Anyone else’s self-confidence crumbled during active addiction? And then, as you move further into recovery, you still think you look like a hot mess who’s bound to achieve nothing?
As someone who battled body dysmorphia long before addiction kicked in, this was a major hurdle for me. The truth is, we all grapple with low self-esteem at different points in our lives. But throw in addiction and a few toxic, abusive relationships, and it’s no surprise your self-worth takes a nosedive.
But here’s the good news: we can train ourselves to shift our mindset about how we view ourselves. And let me reiterate this: THOUGHTS AREN’T FACTS. So, the next time you catch a glimpse in the mirror and think, “What a sight, I’m an absolute mess,” ask yourself what evidence supports that thought. Is it because some toxic ex used to call you fat? Well, newsflash: what does he know, especially when he can’t even find his own backside? Or maybe it’s because you don’t fit society’s narrow standards of beauty? Remember, those standards are constantly changing. It used to be about being stick-thin; now, unless you've got curves like Kim Kardashian, some may say you don’t measure up.
So, let’s challenge those ugly thoughts together and start celebrating our own unique beauty. Your journey in sobriety should come with a boost in self-love, and every day is a chance to redefine what you see in that mirror!
Addiction might have battered you and spat you out; if you’re here now, consider yourself one of the fortunate ones. It’s time to cut yourself some slack. Recovery isn’t a walk in the park—it's a challenging journey filled with countless hurdles to jump over. The choices you made back in the trenches of addiction didn’t serve you; beating yourself up daily and hitting the “sod it” button wasn’t the answer. Now’s the moment to transform that self-loathing into self-love.
Begin by halting those negative thoughts in their tracks; this technique is known as "unhooking" thoughts. Just one unkind thought can spiral into a whirlwind of negativity, taking you down memory lane to that dreaded moment when your boyfriend 17 years ago commented unfavourably about your outfit. It's all about self-awareness—staying tuned in to your thoughts. When a negative idea pops up, stop it dead and flip it on its head. Turn "I’m ugly" into "I’m beautiful." Initially, it might feel like a stretch, but with regular practice, swapping negative thoughts for positive affirmations will reshape your mindset over time.
Remember to continually guide your thinking back to the here and now. Practising mindfulness will help you drown out those insidious negative voices trying to take control. Embrace this journey of self-love and watch how your perspective evolves!
Generate positivity! Take a moment to reflect on the people in your life—do they lift you up or weigh you down? When you were in the throes of addiction, you might not have noticed the negative energy some individuals brought into your space. Now’s the time to evaluate how these relationships impact your wellbeing and make adjustments as needed.
Treat yourself to a pamper session; show yourself the love you'd generously offer your best mate. Go ahead, shave your legs, slather on some moisturiser, and embrace that self-love, even if it’s just you and your two cats for the evening. You are worthy of feeling your best for YOU! It’s the little things that count, so indulge in them without hesitation.
Speaking of indulgence, I'm off to paint my nails and have a heartfelt chat with my reflection, reminding myself that I'm beautiful inside and out.